So here I am, sitting in front of my work table, thinking whether I should write, sleep, or reminisce…
Today, I’m not supposed to be in this room.
The fact that I didn’t make it to our fellowship makes me feel sad. I intentionally planned to take the day off but due to an unexpected reason, I am here — unable to leave the house, feeling blue.
The weather seems to have coordinated with my feelings pretty well. It has been raining straight since yesterday and I’m not sure whether this feeling is because of the bed weather or if it’s just my hormones.
I was hoping a movie can somehow suffice what I feel but alas! My internet has been acting up since last night – including two of my internet backups.
Why am I feeling this? What have I eaten? When did this start? Am I overthinking again? My heart feels empty and I don’t even know why. I hate feeling like this. I don’t even know how to “fix” this.
I am tired and unhappy. Perhaps it’s the routine here at home. Or the loud karaoke playing in the neighborhood, or the fact that I don’t have enough sleep yet. I need something to lift my spirit up. Perhaps a hug from Nate, a yummy meryenda, a quick read and a quiet time will do.
One thing’s for sure – this feeling is not productive and I need to do something about it.